Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Sickness and Feminism

So I have to apologize for not posting for so long, my internet has not been working for the past week, and I'm still negotiating with the company to fix it, so I'm hoping to have it fixed by the weekend.

Today I went to the UN Conference center in Delhi for a round table on women and disarmament, sponsored by WISCOMP, an organization I may want to get an internship with next semester. There was a very interesting presentation on the trafficking of small arms, which did amaze me, but I had to leave half way through because I could tell I had a pretty bad fever. So I spent most of the rest of the day in bed, blowing my nose and sleeping off my fever. (Hopefully me getting sick means the weather is changing...getting cooler...)

While I was there I was having a conversation with one of the girls from my college. Lady Shri Ram College is basically known for being radically feminist, and for producing realist-hating (US given responsibility for realism) feminists. I have a hard time considering myself a feminist. I'm all for equality, but my kind of equality is about all being human. Whenever I engage with feminist ideas, I always feel myself made to feel a woman, not a human, as if being a woman was somehow a distinct category separate of greater humanity. I appreciate feminist concerns in conflict studies, where rape as an instrument of war and the economic aftermaths of conflict as pertains to women are areas that merit study and action. But I don't like being told that I'm a woman, therefore I nurture peace. I am a woman, therefore I have a different perspective on international relations.

I am a human, and I expect to be treated like a human. And despite this so-called feminist institution, I have never felt so repressed for being a woman as I have at LSR. The warden of the hostel frowns upon any going out of the hostel for the weekend or a late night, because obviously girls are putting themselves in danger and degrading themselves by hanging out with boys. The men who work on campus won't make eye contact with you in the hallways. All forms ask for permission from your parents (father) or legal guardian, even if you are a legal adult. This is the first place I have been told I could not do something because I'm a woman, and I'm being  told this by supposed feminists. I understand this is India, and there are legitimate safety concerns, but the point I wanted to raise (perhaps confused by my ranting) is how my friend explained so well today:

The UN MDG is to promote gender equality BY empowering women.
Feminist literature often seems to focus on empowering women, not gender equality.

I'm a human, then a woman. A lot of feminism makes me feel pinned into a role of a peaceful, nurturing, life-giving woman. I would prefer if someone didn't hold a door for me but treated me like a human, than hold a door for me and make me feel like I am something distinct from them. 

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